This site is a Complete Resource Guide for MALE Victims & Survivors of Abuse and is here to provide all the information and resources you may need if you are thinking of getting help and healing your life in order to move forward in a positive direction.
We also wish to inspire people and organizations that provide help services to female victims and survivors to start offering specialized services for abused males, if you do not already.
If you are a service provider, we offer information here to help you start to understand some basics of how to deal with the special needs of male victims and survivors of all forms of abuse. Male Abuse Awareness Week Dec. 1-8 2012 is HERE!
We also wish to inspire people and organizations that provide help services to female victims and survivors to start offering specialized services for abused males, if you do not already.
If you are a service provider, we offer information here to help you start to understand some basics of how to deal with the special needs of male victims and survivors of all forms of abuse. Male Abuse Awareness Week Dec. 1-8 2012 is HERE!
TYPES OF MALE ABUSE:
DESCRIPTIONS AND STATISTICS
DESCRIPTIONS AND STATISTICS
SEXUAL ABUSE
Noun S: (n) sexual assault, sexual abuse, sex crime, sex offense (a statutory offense that provides that it is a crime to knowingly cause another person to engage in an unwanted sexual act by force or threat)
"most states have replaced the common law definition of rape with statutes defining sexual assault"
(http://wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=sexual%20abuse)
1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused before their 16th birthday.
(US Deptartment of Justice)
As many as 1 in 5 males will be sexually abused before the age of 18. One in five of adult rape victims are male.
(Federal Bureau of Investigation in the US, or FBI)
In one study of 30 male victims of sexual abuse, the average age at the first time of abuse was 8 years, 4 months.
(Dorais, 2002)
According to the report by the Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS), “Sexual Victimization in State and Federal Prisons Reported by Inmates, 2007,” 4.5 percent of the state and federal prisoners surveyed reported sexual victimization in the past 12 months. Given a national prison population of 1,570,861, the BJS findings suggest that in one year alone more than 70,000 prisoners were sexually abused.
(http://www.hrw.org/en/news/2007/12/15/us-federal-statistics-show-widespread-prison-rape)
80% of men who have experienced sexual abuse have been abused by a female, most often their mother.
Women are responsible for one-third of the sexual abuse of boys, according to the 2 December 1998 CE Journal of the American Medical Association
Rape is defined on a state-by-state basis. In some states, the rape of men is not defined by law under the same terminology or degree of offense as the rape of women. Some states do not even recognize oral or anal penetration as being rape.
(Claudia Rodas, California State University)
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND PHYSICAL ABUSE
Noun S: (n) domestic violence, violence or physical abuse directed toward your spouse or domestic partner.(http://wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=domestic%20violence)
At least 41 percent of the victims of domestic violence are men but other studies and surveys show nearly 50 percent of the victims are men.
(Harvey P. Forehand)
~Approximately 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are physically assaulted by an intimate partner annually in the United States
~Intimate partners committed 3% of the nonfatal violence against men
~In 2000, 1,247 women and 440 men were killed by an intimate partner. In recent years, an intimate partner killed approximately 33% of female murder victims and 4% of male murder victims
~4% of men and 5% of women reported receiving serious injuries (knife wounds, internal injuries, broken bones, or loss of consciousness.
(Patricia Tjaden & Nancy Thoennes, U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 181867, Extent, Nature, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence, at iii (2000), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/pubs-sum/181867.htm)
In a retrospective study of male victims 60% reported being abused by females. The same rate was found also in a sample of college students. In other studies the levels were found as high as 72% o 82%.
(Risin and Ross,1987)
Why Women Assault:
California State University surveyed 1,000 college women: 30% admitted they assaulted a male partner. Their most common reasons: (1) my partner wasn't listening to me; (2) my partner wasn't being sensitive to my needs; and (3) I wished to gain my partner's attention. As one man said, "I'm supposed to take it like a man."
Claudia Dias criticizes the different ways domestic violence against men and women is viewed. "When a man hits a woman, it's abuse and felony. When she does it, it's because she has a bad temper."
(Claudia Rodas, California State University)
Assaults by Women on Their Spouses or Male Partners: Virtually all sociological data shows women initiate domestic violence as often as men, that women use weapons more than men, and that 38% of injured victims are men.
(California State University Professor Martin Fiebert summarizes almost 200 of these studies online.)
One in six men will be a victim of domestic abuse in their lifetime.
(The British Crime Survey 2006/07 figures)
ABUSE IN GAY MALES
15% of gay men who had lived with a male partner reported being victimized by a male partner. 15.4% of same-sex cohabiting men reported being raped, physically assaulted and/or stalked by a male partner, but 10.8% reported such violence by a female partner.
(US Deptartment of Justice)
Gay and bisexual men experience abuse in intimate partner relationship at a rate of 2 in 5.
(UK survivors.org)
Same-sex batterers use forms of abuse similar to those of heterosexual batterers. They have an additional weapon in the threat of “outing” their partner to family, friends, employers or community.
(Lundy, Abuse That Dare Not Speak Its Name: Assisting Victims of Lesbian and Gay Domestic Violence in Massachusetts, 28 New Eng. L. Rev. 273 (Winter 1993)
OTHER MALE ABUSE SITUATIONS
Emotional Abuse- For all kinds of reasons men are less likely than women to be the victims of those kinds of abuse that leave obvious physical evidence. In other words, abusive women tend to prefer forms of abuse that don't involve physical violence. The hurt, the injury caused by the habitual use of vicious mockery, frequent emotional blackmail, spreading odious lies and so on aren't visible.
(Harvey P. Forehand)
Mental (Abuse)– 91% are shouted at : 91% are controlled : 93% are verbally denigrated:76% suffer from false allegations : 66% are threatened with a police callout: 72% suffer from sleep deprivation : 64% suffer from physical threats : 46% suffer from police callouts : 31% suffer from death threats : 14% suffer from ex-partner injunctions.
Financial Control (Abuse)– 53% suffer from their partner's debt: 59% suffer from financial control by partner.
Use of Children (Abuse)– 39% of mothers threaten to remove the children: 40% encourage the children to ignore or undermine him: 9% encourage the children to assault him.
Children (Witnessing Abuse)– 78% of callers have children: 71% are aged under 12: 48% witnessed the physical abuse : 59% witnessed the mental abuse : 64% heard the abuse : 16% were physically abused by the mother.
(Mankindinnitiative.org)
Covert Incest occurs when a parent is unable or unwilling to maintain a relationship with another adult and forces the emotional role of a spouse onto their child instead. The child's needs are ignored and instead the relationship exists solely to meet the needs of the parent and the adult may not be aware of the issues created by their actions.
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Covert_incest)
Bullying: What Is The Definition of Bullying? A lot of young people have a good idea of what bullying is because they see it every day! Bullying happens when someone hurts or scares another person on purpose and the person being bullied has a hard time defending himself or herself. Usually, bullying happens over and over.
• Punching, shoving, and other acts that hurt people physically
• Spreading bad rumors about people
• Keeping certain people out of a "group"
• Teasing people in a mean way
• Getting certain people to "gang up" on others
Cyberbullying: Bullying also can happen online or electronically. Cyberbullying is when children or teens bully each other using the Internet, mobile phones or other cyber technology. This can include:
• Sending mean text, email, or instant messages
• Posting nasty pictures or messages about others in blogs or on Web sites
• Using someone else's user name to spread rumors or lies about someone
(http://stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/kids/what-is-bullying.aspx)
Male Sexual Harassment, Article: Male Sexual Harassment in the Work Place on the Rise; According to a report by the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission there were a record amount of harassment complaints filed by men in 2006. The figures given in the report state that of the 12,025 sexual harassment claims made in 2006 15.4 percent of these claims came from men. This shows a significant increase of male harassment cases made in the last ten years of 4.5.
(http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/175980/male_sexual_harassment_in_the_work.html)
Child Obesity: The case has attracted national attention. With childhood obesity on the rise across the US, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Gray's attorney says it could open the door to more criminal action against parents whose children have become dangerously overweight.
(http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/weightloss/2009-07-20-obesityboy_N.htm)
Report: MeMe Roth- NAAO- Child Obesity Child Abuse- CNN Paula Zahn
SPECIALIZED MALE ABUSE HELP SERVICES
Cults: Males are tempting targets for cults and radical groups that abuse people. If you are considering becoming part of an unusual social group, please do some research so you will be able to recognize if you are getting yourself into an abusive situation. If you are with one of these groups you are most likely still being victimized.
Some help and information can be found at the links below.
Rosanne Henry, L.P.C.
International Cultic Studies Association (ICSA)
Stop Mind Control and Ritual Abuse Today
Ritual Abuse, Ritual Crime and Healing
Survivorship
Endritualabuse.org
Breaking the Circle of Satanic Ritual Abuse (book)Stalking is becoming very dangerous for males. Stalk: to pursue obsessively and to the point of harassment.
(Merriam-Webster)
Michael G. Conner, Psy.D gives great tips on how to deal with stalkers.
Munchausen by Proxy is when someone is causing illness or injury in another to obtain attention; usually by a parent or caregiver against a child.
(http://www.askdrscully.com/psychward.html)
This normally happens to children who cannot yet speak, but there have been cases recorded with older children as well. For more information on this syndrome, see the KidsHealth web site.
Noun S: (n) sexual assault, sexual abuse, sex crime, sex offense (a statutory offense that provides that it is a crime to knowingly cause another person to engage in an unwanted sexual act by force or threat)
"most states have replaced the common law definition of rape with statutes defining sexual assault"
(http://wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=sexual%20abuse)
1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused before their 16th birthday.
(US Deptartment of Justice)
As many as 1 in 5 males will be sexually abused before the age of 18. One in five of adult rape victims are male.
(Federal Bureau of Investigation in the US, or FBI)
In one study of 30 male victims of sexual abuse, the average age at the first time of abuse was 8 years, 4 months.
(Dorais, 2002)
According to the report by the Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS), “Sexual Victimization in State and Federal Prisons Reported by Inmates, 2007,” 4.5 percent of the state and federal prisoners surveyed reported sexual victimization in the past 12 months. Given a national prison population of 1,570,861, the BJS findings suggest that in one year alone more than 70,000 prisoners were sexually abused.
(http://www.hrw.org/en/news/2007/12/15/us-federal-statistics-show-widespread-prison-rape)
80% of men who have experienced sexual abuse have been abused by a female, most often their mother.
Women are responsible for one-third of the sexual abuse of boys, according to the 2 December 1998 CE Journal of the American Medical Association
Rape is defined on a state-by-state basis. In some states, the rape of men is not defined by law under the same terminology or degree of offense as the rape of women. Some states do not even recognize oral or anal penetration as being rape.
(Claudia Rodas, California State University)
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND PHYSICAL ABUSE
Noun S: (n) domestic violence, violence or physical abuse directed toward your spouse or domestic partner.(http://wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=domestic%20violence)
At least 41 percent of the victims of domestic violence are men but other studies and surveys show nearly 50 percent of the victims are men.
(Harvey P. Forehand)
~Approximately 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are physically assaulted by an intimate partner annually in the United States
~Intimate partners committed 3% of the nonfatal violence against men
~In 2000, 1,247 women and 440 men were killed by an intimate partner. In recent years, an intimate partner killed approximately 33% of female murder victims and 4% of male murder victims
~4% of men and 5% of women reported receiving serious injuries (knife wounds, internal injuries, broken bones, or loss of consciousness.
(Patricia Tjaden & Nancy Thoennes, U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 181867, Extent, Nature, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence, at iii (2000), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/pubs-sum/181867.htm)
In a retrospective study of male victims 60% reported being abused by females. The same rate was found also in a sample of college students. In other studies the levels were found as high as 72% o 82%.
(Risin and Ross,1987)
Why Women Assault:
California State University surveyed 1,000 college women: 30% admitted they assaulted a male partner. Their most common reasons: (1) my partner wasn't listening to me; (2) my partner wasn't being sensitive to my needs; and (3) I wished to gain my partner's attention. As one man said, "I'm supposed to take it like a man."
Claudia Dias criticizes the different ways domestic violence against men and women is viewed. "When a man hits a woman, it's abuse and felony. When she does it, it's because she has a bad temper."
(Claudia Rodas, California State University)
Assaults by Women on Their Spouses or Male Partners: Virtually all sociological data shows women initiate domestic violence as often as men, that women use weapons more than men, and that 38% of injured victims are men.
(California State University Professor Martin Fiebert summarizes almost 200 of these studies online.)
One in six men will be a victim of domestic abuse in their lifetime.
(The British Crime Survey 2006/07 figures)
ABUSE IN GAY MALES
15% of gay men who had lived with a male partner reported being victimized by a male partner. 15.4% of same-sex cohabiting men reported being raped, physically assaulted and/or stalked by a male partner, but 10.8% reported such violence by a female partner.
(US Deptartment of Justice)
Gay and bisexual men experience abuse in intimate partner relationship at a rate of 2 in 5.
(UK survivors.org)
Same-sex batterers use forms of abuse similar to those of heterosexual batterers. They have an additional weapon in the threat of “outing” their partner to family, friends, employers or community.
(Lundy, Abuse That Dare Not Speak Its Name: Assisting Victims of Lesbian and Gay Domestic Violence in Massachusetts, 28 New Eng. L. Rev. 273 (Winter 1993)
OTHER MALE ABUSE SITUATIONS
Emotional Abuse- For all kinds of reasons men are less likely than women to be the victims of those kinds of abuse that leave obvious physical evidence. In other words, abusive women tend to prefer forms of abuse that don't involve physical violence. The hurt, the injury caused by the habitual use of vicious mockery, frequent emotional blackmail, spreading odious lies and so on aren't visible.
(Harvey P. Forehand)
Mental (Abuse)– 91% are shouted at : 91% are controlled : 93% are verbally denigrated:76% suffer from false allegations : 66% are threatened with a police callout: 72% suffer from sleep deprivation : 64% suffer from physical threats : 46% suffer from police callouts : 31% suffer from death threats : 14% suffer from ex-partner injunctions.
Financial Control (Abuse)– 53% suffer from their partner's debt: 59% suffer from financial control by partner.
Use of Children (Abuse)– 39% of mothers threaten to remove the children: 40% encourage the children to ignore or undermine him: 9% encourage the children to assault him.
Children (Witnessing Abuse)– 78% of callers have children: 71% are aged under 12: 48% witnessed the physical abuse : 59% witnessed the mental abuse : 64% heard the abuse : 16% were physically abused by the mother.
(Mankindinnitiative.org)
Covert Incest occurs when a parent is unable or unwilling to maintain a relationship with another adult and forces the emotional role of a spouse onto their child instead. The child's needs are ignored and instead the relationship exists solely to meet the needs of the parent and the adult may not be aware of the issues created by their actions.
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Covert_incest)
Bullying: What Is The Definition of Bullying? A lot of young people have a good idea of what bullying is because they see it every day! Bullying happens when someone hurts or scares another person on purpose and the person being bullied has a hard time defending himself or herself. Usually, bullying happens over and over.
• Punching, shoving, and other acts that hurt people physically
• Spreading bad rumors about people
• Keeping certain people out of a "group"
• Teasing people in a mean way
• Getting certain people to "gang up" on others
Cyberbullying: Bullying also can happen online or electronically. Cyberbullying is when children or teens bully each other using the Internet, mobile phones or other cyber technology. This can include:
• Sending mean text, email, or instant messages
• Posting nasty pictures or messages about others in blogs or on Web sites
• Using someone else's user name to spread rumors or lies about someone
(http://stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/kids/what-is-bullying.aspx)
Male Sexual Harassment, Article: Male Sexual Harassment in the Work Place on the Rise; According to a report by the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission there were a record amount of harassment complaints filed by men in 2006. The figures given in the report state that of the 12,025 sexual harassment claims made in 2006 15.4 percent of these claims came from men. This shows a significant increase of male harassment cases made in the last ten years of 4.5.
(http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/175980/male_sexual_harassment_in_the_work.html)
Child Obesity: The case has attracted national attention. With childhood obesity on the rise across the US, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Gray's attorney says it could open the door to more criminal action against parents whose children have become dangerously overweight.
(http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/weightloss/2009-07-20-obesityboy_N.htm)
Report: MeMe Roth- NAAO- Child Obesity Child Abuse- CNN Paula Zahn
SPECIALIZED MALE ABUSE HELP SERVICES
Cults: Males are tempting targets for cults and radical groups that abuse people. If you are considering becoming part of an unusual social group, please do some research so you will be able to recognize if you are getting yourself into an abusive situation. If you are with one of these groups you are most likely still being victimized.
Some help and information can be found at the links below.
Rosanne Henry, L.P.C.
International Cultic Studies Association (ICSA)
Stop Mind Control and Ritual Abuse Today
Ritual Abuse, Ritual Crime and Healing
Survivorship
Endritualabuse.org
Breaking the Circle of Satanic Ritual Abuse (book)Stalking is becoming very dangerous for males. Stalk: to pursue obsessively and to the point of harassment.
(Merriam-Webster)
Michael G. Conner, Psy.D gives great tips on how to deal with stalkers.
Munchausen by Proxy is when someone is causing illness or injury in another to obtain attention; usually by a parent or caregiver against a child.
(http://www.askdrscully.com/psychward.html)
This normally happens to children who cannot yet speak, but there have been cases recorded with older children as well. For more information on this syndrome, see the KidsHealth web site.
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